Saturday, November 21, 2009

Homecoming and Daddy Little Girls!

Yesterday I picked David up at the air port. I was way early don't know if it was nerves or scared I would be late.
But once he got off the plane and walked through the door it was amazing. Just seeing his face and being able to hug and touch him was incredible. He wouldn't let go. and I do believe he was crying a little, What an awesome man who has emotions to express how much he loves me.
I can not put into words the how sweet it was to see the homecoming with the girls.

We picked up Corryn first, she smiled so big and ran into his arms telling him how much she missed him and then runs to her cubicle to get something for David. She had made cards for him. When we left, the girls normally run ahead of us but this time Corryn ran a little ahead STOPPED and Turned around and looked at David ( I think to make sure it wasn't a dream) and then ran back to him and grabbed his hand and walked with us.
Corryn is a big home body, she always wants to go home and never wants to go get Hollyn. But once we got in the car, she talked non stopped about we need to go get Hollyn so we are all together again.!! What a sweetie!!

At Hollyn school, we walked down the hill to the playground, she saw us, walk a little to us, then Stopped (could it be) then took off running yelling "Daddy, Daddy", they ran into each others arms, hugging and crying! Oh my! What a homecoming.!! I wish I had a camera, but my heart will alway hold this memory!

Neither girl could stop talking! I think they were pretty excited to have daddy home. We went to eat I asked for a big booth so both girls to sit by David. I sometimes feel like a fifth wheel but I really don't mind. I am glad he is home and we are together even if it is a short visit.
All night long, it was David and his too little girls, but I don't mind. They need him and he needs them, they are Daddy' Little Girls!!! and I wouldn't change anything about it.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

What's on my wall?

Daniel 5:5
In the same hour came forth fingers of a man's hand, and wrote over against the candlestick upon the plaster of the wall of the king's palace;
Daniel 5:27
You have been weighed on the scales and found wanting

This was from sunday's sermon and one of the questions pastor Sam asked was "what is written on your wall"
I have been thinking about this question for awhile ever since I got on FB. What do I want to post. A friend asked me soon after I got on FB what did I think of it and my reply was "I thought it would be more encouraging or edifing to God. Her response to me was "maybe that is something you can do" ouch! Do I really want to be told what is right. But she is right, If I want my wall to be a blessing then it is upto me to make it that. Not only that, I want others to know where I stand, so my question to myself is "what is on my wall?"
What do I want on my wall - I want my wall to be filled with encouragement, love, and praise for the King. I'm not speaking just about the physical wall of blogging or FB but my spiritual life also.
We all put up walls. They protect us, (we think), we don't want to be hurt or allow someone to get too close, or we want to be isolated. We don't want to share anything, maybe we are selfish, scared, hurt, the list could go on. But what is written on our/my wall is written in our/my heart. So I go deeper - what is written in my heart? Is it bitterness, anger, jeolousy, guilt, selfishness, greediness,fear, lack of faith, discouragement, etc. It is all of these and so much more and I will be weighed and found wanting.
I want a new heart, a new wall, Please Lord rewrite my wall
I struggle everyday to rewrite my wall, to change, to have a new heart but I am so thankful I have hope. I press forward, I run the race. I read my bible, I pray, I mediate on His word, I love others, I love God, and slowly my wall will be changed. It will be rewritten by The Savior who died for me, who saved me, who fills this heart up with His love, peace, joy, faith! I can't rewrite the wall only He can and His word. So So thankful!!! Praise the Lord!! He is worthy to be praised.
I know I will be weighed but with God and God alone I wont be found wanting!

Psalm 119:11 Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee.

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Mornings!! How I love them!

It has been a long weekend until this morning. There is alway something good, renewing about the mornings for me. I am a morning person. My hubby is not. But that is whole other post.
So last night, I was feeling low, discouraged. Hadn't heard from anyone about anything in a couple of days. I was feeling no one cares, oh me, having myself a pity party. But then my hubby called. That made it some better. But I was still down on myself too because the day did not go as I had planned. Daughter grumpy, I spent money I shouldn't have, my house is a wreck, I need to clean but didn't, I wanted pizza but had pb&j sandwich ( it just doesn't compare does it), I could go on with my whining but I will stop. So off to bed, and after 7 hrs of sleep, interrupted by my oldest, I wake up to a beautiful day.
Even if it were raining I would love the mornings. Ever since I was a kid, going to bed and waking up to a new day made everything better.
My mood is lifted, I look forward to the day, and what it may be like. A new day and new start. I love the anticipation of what it will bring!!!
Driving to church today, the sun is so bright, it warmed my heart! The weather is awesome. Cool in the mornings, beautiful fall colors. Christmas music playing (i know a little early). I just want to be able to praise God no matter what. I knew I failed last night. Could I do this for a whole year? Something has to change now. I need YOU now! Lord, stop my pitiful whines, my grumpiness. I want to be better at this, a better Christian. There is so much I should be thankful like everything. I don't want to be this person who whines, complains, argues, yells at her kids. I want to go through this deployment with grace. I want to be remember as someone who is praising God not complaining. Thank you lord it is a new day, a new start.
A few months ago in preparations of this deployment, my thoughts went to how I want to be in a year from now. I don't want to waste this opportunity to grow closer to God. What kind of person will I be. My thoughts went to 1 Cor 2:2 For I determined not to know anything among you, save Jesus Christ, and him crucified.
I don't care if anyone calls, my life is based on my relationship with Jesus not anyone else. I need HIM! I will get what I put into it. If I give HIM nothing, I get Nothing in return. I have to get to know Him. I failed at reading my bible this week , this past month. My mind is paying for it. I am so confused, so jumble, so clutter. Help me Lord. I obsess over silly things and not YOU. Forgive me for that. Forgive me for failing Lord, for my lack of faith, my self pity, my anger, my selfishness, my lack of time with YOU.
Thank you Lord for the mornings, for a new day. For Forgiveness. For starting over. I love you lord.

Friday, November 6, 2009

God showing up!

I really want this blog to be real, I am not a good writer but I know God is real in my life and I want to share it with everyone.
David left monday for training but God showed up. Granted He is always with me but He showed me how much He cares for the little things in my life.
God showed up when Corryn got sick on tuesday, we thought she had the flu. Took her to the doctor, she tested negative but he still thought she had the flu due to her symptoms. Came home gave her medicine for fever then by seven, she along with her sister fall asleep on the couch. I called in to work to keep her home thinking she is going to be sick for days. Well after many people praying, she woke up on wednesday, NO FEVER, playing, eating, and laughing. What A GREAT GOD we serve!!!! God showed up.!!!
God showed up when I got a card from church today saying they are praying for me. Awesome! It is such an encouragement to hear that. Now I need to be sending someone that too. Because I just don't want to receive but to give also.
God showed up when Hollyn after waking up 6 nights in a row with bad dreams on the seventh night she still woke up but NO BAD DREAMS!!! What an awesome God.!!!!
God showed up when friends called, FB, or emailed me saying they are praying for me.
How can I ever pay them back. Lord, teach me to pray, to be a true friend.
God showed up when I thought I lost twenty dollars, I prayed that whoever finds it will be blessed by it, God showed up by allowing me to find it and blessed me and my girls with gift. God showed up. I was reminded this week by someone, we can not out give God!!!
Thank you God for showing up.!!!